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[雅思作文批改] 作文批改范文,Sharon老师点评学生作文。

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发表于 2017-5-24 11:28:13 | 显示全部楼层
学生作文:

老师, 这篇题目我发现我一开始跑题了, 我理解成应该话更多的时间在实际技能上还是在理论知识上, 写了一半发现不对了~~~
我想让老师帮我看看我的第一篇是否跑题,如果跑题能拿多少分?? 第二篇是否切题? 可以有几分???太感谢


Writing task 2:
    Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills.Do you agree or disagree?

Answer 1:
    Nowadays, whether theoretical knowledge or practical skills should be taught with more time has triggered a heated discussion. Some people claim that too much time is payed on theoretical knowledge while no enough practical skills are not imparted in all levels of education including primary schools, middle schools and universities. As far as I am concerned, I will go along with statement.
    First of all, for primary school students and middle school students, practical skills can broaden their scope of knowledge, which will be very helpful for their future lives and studies. For example, distinguishing right from wrong is a significant skill that can prevent themselves from potential hazard. To improve their learning efficiency, time management skill is also a necessity to them.
    Besides, for the university students, practical skills can prepare them for employment. As is well known, the students with strong social skills can work and cooperate more closely with their future colleagues. Problem-solving skill is also imperative so that they can be employed easily in the future.
    Admittedly, we can not neglect the importance of learning facts. The basic course such as chemistry and physics are the cornerstones of other practical courses and there is strong interrelationship between facts and practical skills. However, practical skill will provide more benefits because they are more close to the social lives.
    Based on the above discussion and analysis, it is easy to draw a conclusion that students in all levels of education should lay more emphasis on practical skills because they are more important for studentsfuture.

Answer 2:
    Nowadays, whether theoretical knowledge or practical skills should be taught with more time has triggered a heated discussion. Some people claim that too much time is payed on theoretical knowledge while no enough practical skills are not imparted in all levels of education including primary schools, middle schools and universities. As far as I am concerned, I will go along with statement.
    First of all, for most primary and middle school student, they lack enough time to attend social activities because of heavy academic load. I have two children, one is in primary school and the other is in middle school. Unfortunately, they have to spend many efforts on their home works which is not helpful to their personalities, which means much leisure time is deprived. In contrast, no enough practical skill, for example, money management and distinguishing right from wrong,  are taught in schools. My children often waste much money on what they are interested in, but in fact those goods such as candies are harmful to their teeth.
    Besides, many university graduates do not have enough social experience so that they will be defrauded easily. We often can hear from news that university students are absorbed by criminal groups and are forced to pay consult fee to employment agency for job opportunities that do not exist actually.on the other hand, they contribute too much time on academic works. For example, when I was learning in university, I have to finish at least eight courses in one semester, which made me get stuck in academic pressure. However, I think some of these courses are not helpful to my future career.
    Based on the above discussion and analysis, it is easy to draw a conclusion that students in all levels of education lack practical skills and too much time is donated to the facts. Schools and universities should keep a balance between them.



Shron老师点评内容:

游客,如果您要查看本帖隐藏内容请回复
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发表于 2017-8-8 19:29:04 | 显示全部楼层
待我长发及腰,我来下载资料可好。
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发表于 2017-8-9 09:32:49 | 显示全部楼层
你造么,资料下载,根本停不下来
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发表于 2017-8-9 09:40:01 | 显示全部楼层
人生有风险,回帖需谨慎,下载资料走人。
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发表于 2017-8-9 09:56:43 | 显示全部楼层
如果你智商能再高点,也许我会上当,但是资料下载我一定会上当。
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发表于 2017-8-15 17:21:14 | 显示全部楼层
这么多资料可以下载,楼主费心了!
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发表于 2017-8-15 17:31:43 | 显示全部楼层
我为资料带盐,我为自己袋盐
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发表于 2017-8-15 17:32:47 | 显示全部楼层
赞!!!楼主好人有好报的,这么多资料免费下载太爽了
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发表于 2017-8-22 18:08:38 | 显示全部楼层
简直就是棒棒棒极了~马住慢慢挑选合适的资料下载
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发表于 2017-8-30 16:12:35 | 显示全部楼层
真知灼见啊!楼主的帖子实在是一句中地。子曰:三人行而必有我师焉。斯言善哉。不知不觉上网这么多年,好的坏的帖子都看过了,看多了。渐渐的也觉得没什么意思了。渐渐觉得自己已经达到奋斗的顶峰了。可是,第一眼看到楼主的这个帖子的时候,我的眼前竟然感觉一亮!仿佛看到了倾城倾国的美人,正轻摇柳步款款而行。正好似楼主的这个帖子,语态端正,论证从容。哈哈哈哈编不下去了,赶紧下载资料去~~~
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